This weekend my husband and I had a weak and transformation moment. We decided to walk into the pet stores of the Mall. The first one was your typical franchised (most likely a puppy mill) pet store. My heart hurt for all these dogs because I so want them to go to good homes and not be forced to be destroyed or sent to "shelters" until which time a person would scoop them up take then home and love them until the end of time. It's funny how the sales clerks pounce on you. They see you with two kids and gazing willingly at a dog or two and think they can sucker you in.
I fell in love with a French Bull Mastiff (aka Dogue de Bordeaux). My husband looked it up online from his Android phone and determined the dog wouldn't be for us because the life expectancy was only 6-8 years. After losing our dog in January and she was just 3 days shy of 6 years old and my husband's beagle became terminally ill at the age of 6 - our next dog has to break the age barrier of 6 years old by at least 3-6 years. Although I was gazing at this puppy longingly, I'm not so sure I'm ready to take on a puppy, have gotten over the decision to put my Zoey down 6 months earlier and I prefer not to get my dog from a Pet Store in the Mall.
This particular Mall actually has two pet stores. The other pet store is less "formal" and pretty much a tiny shop where puppies, kittens, and the occasional pot belly pig are for sale. The shop owner pretty much rescues animals from careless breeders, or unsuspecting breeders is probably more like it. You know the dog owner who forgets to "fix" their dog and wind up with a dog delivering 8+ puppies of an unknown background. The owner cares about these puppies, its obvious, but the shop is sort of "back-alley" looking. Anyway, my husband and I were looking at the puppies and the kids were able to play with the puppies after washing their hands. They had to wash hands after touching each puppy so that they didn't get them sick by cross-contamination with viruses/bacteria. Again, the reason we stopped in was to get our "dog" fix and nothing more.
When I turned around, I saw my husband holding a 5 month old beagle/terrier mix puppy. The dog had kissed him in the face and I saw the longing in my husband's eyes. This dog was it. He had instantly fallen in love with this dog. I instantly felt this rush of anxiety come over me and a pit in my stomach. Yes, the dog was very sweet looking and cute, but I hadn't quite convinced myself yet that I am ready for another dog. A couple of weeks ago, my husband says to me while we were taking a family walk to go get ice cream that he thinks he's getting the "itch" for another dog. I should have known that walking into a pet store where you can pet the dogs was going to be a dangerous thing. It didn't help that this puppy had the eyes of his beloved "Flyer" - my husband's beagle he had to put down after we couldn't successfully treat a terminal illness. I could see in my husband's eyes that this dog would replace the beagle he so loved. Zoey was my dog. Flyer was his. Flyer will always be his dog. As much as my husband would never admit this, he never got over Flyer's death and Zoey only captured part of his heart. It's not that he didn't love Zoey, because he did - it was just different between Zoey and me and Jon and Zoey. I was more emotionally involved with the dog because she was with me every day. We connected when I was pregnant with Norah, she sat by me when I was in the throws of pre-eclampsia and HELLP syndrome, as if to protect me from all the pain. We just had this connection. I think Jon was just too saddened by the death of Flyer that his heart wasn't ready to totally be consumed by Zoey.
So when I saw Jon holding this dog and the look in his eye I knew he was contemplating purchasing this puppy. He was seriously contemplating this puppy. I think I was in "shock" because he's always been the level headed one and I'm the mushy lets rescue this dog person. I looked at the two of them and I knew they fit together. The question for me is, would this puppy fit with me and the kids? So by a stroke of luck, Jon came to his senses and said, its time to leave and when we got about 100 feet from the pet store, he said I really like that dog. We both decided that impulse shopping for a pet was not the right thing to do so we walked away and decided to talk about it when we got home. The pros and cons of having a puppy now and that puppy in particular.
I have to admit, I fell in love with the idea that my husband found a dog. One that he connected with. I thought it was so sweet. It was genuine! So it made me look at this dog and begin to take interest in it and began to fall for it too. When we got home and the kids went to bed, we started looking up dogs that fall under this "mixed" breed of beagle and terrier. We don't exactly know what type of terrier the dog was but guessed that maybe it was a border terrier based on the markings. The dog had the body shape of beagle, fur coloring of a beagle and floppy ears like a beagle. His fur, however, was coarse and much like that of a terrier. I liked the idea that this pooch might actually not shed! We decided to table it and maybe go back the next day to see if the "feelings" were still there. While laying in bed, I said to my husband, I already named that darn dog. He looks like a Louie to me. Jon chuckled and said, yeah, that name does fit that dog perfectly. Ugh, I was getting sucked in.
We did go back the next day and we got to play with the dog, but my kids weren't all that interested in this particular dog. So to me that was a telltale sign that maybe this pooch wasn't for us. The dog has to be one that we all fall in love with - not just Jon and not just me.
I look at how my life is so busy with a child starting kindergarten in two days, a son that has feeding issues and me, a Mom, who just needs a break. I think that a dog will be a part of our family, but I think we need to research the dog we want. I think we need to let the dust settle in our crazy lives. I have to agree with my father-in-law; now is not the time for a dog!
I'm sorry sweet little Louie! You are so very cute, someone will come along and scoop you up. Someone who can give you the unconditional love and attention you deserve. Thank you sweet Louie, for helping me mend a broken heart. Thank you for helping me begin to breakdown the wall I put up 6+ months ago, and helping me to open my heart to considering a new family pet someday. You are an angel sent from above!
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